I am the proud owner of a very beautiful Iphone 6. I really like it. It takes fine pictures. It texts with great ease. It even can make or take an occasional call. But we’re going through a rough patch in our relationship and if it was possible to punch a phone battery I would.*
*Hubbard Radio-Wadena does not condone the use of violence on anything, inanimate or otherwise.
It’s honestly infuriating. I don’t mind dropped calls- just wait until you get service again and call back. I don’t mind data overage charges- they’re annoying but what can you do? Not do a Youtube deep dive on barbershop quartets? This battery thing is nuts. I might as well have a landline with how often I need to plug this stupid thing in!
I did, however, find something out kind of cool about my phone. Here’s how you can find out how dumb your battery is too:
Go to your settings and find “Battery”
Click on Battery Health
Finally, laugh uncontrollably at “Maximum Capacity” of your battery
That’s right. My phone’s battery is operating at 51% in it’s best untethered moments. You know that feeling in the pit of your stomach when your charge is down to 2%? Well that’s how I feel now when my battery says 40% because it’s actually 40% of 51! Do you know what 40% of 51 is? I do. I did the math. It’s 20%. When my phone is at 40%. I’m getting 20% usage. This thing is a boat anchor.
My favorite part is the first sentence of the final paragraph in that last picture. “Your battery’s health is significantly degraded.”
And for the record, as you can see in the first picture, when I started this my phone was at 69% and as I hit publish on this bad boy it’s now…